It all begins...

The post below is my goal, this post is to reveal who I am.

I am type 1 diabetic, was diagnosed when I was 19 years old, however due to me avoiding the doctors my diagnosis may have been much earlier, maybe even before I hit the teens. Denials a bitch. I'm going to admit for the first time since being diagnosed, I am not in control of my blood sugars, never have been and could face long term complications if i don't get my act together. I've been lying to everyone I know, telling them all is fine, when in fact I have lost feeling in my left big toe, my eyesights terrible, my moodswings are crazy and my thirst is just never ending.

My weight loss is not because I want to fit into the size 12 clothes, or to look pretty, it is to improve my health so that I can one day be a mother. I'm married, almost 7 years now and really happy with my husband. However being an indian woman, I do get asked ALL THE TIME "When you having children?" some of my friends already have children, I hear them say "Have them young" and I respond with a bagful of excuses except the truth. Truth is I am not healthy enough to be a mother, if I had a child now, there would be high risk to him/her and I will not let that happen.

I also have Psoriasis, on about 60% of my body, nasty stuff especially if you're looking at it :( Not sure how it all started, but I have it. This is another thing I am not in control of, I got obsessed with the steroid cream and took a break from it. About time I went back on :)

So that's what is wrong with me :D lol

I know what the future holds if I stray from the goal I have set.